Settling in at kindergarten: how long does it really take?
Most people have heard that settling in takes three days. That number appears nowhere in Oslo's own guidance. What the city actually says is that a child may need a couple of weeks or more of short kindergarten days — and that is a rather different message to bring to your employer.
Three days is often what the kindergarten asks you to set aside to be present yourself. That is not the same as the child being settled after three days. The two get conflated constantly, and that conflation is what makes week two hard.
What happens
Your child gets a key person
One member of staff has the main responsibility for your child at the start. This is the person your child should come to trust first, and who gradually introduces them to the others. Ask who it is before the first day — it makes that first morning easier for all three of you.
You have a start-up conversation
A dedicated conversation between you and the kindergarten before or around the start. This is where it is worth mentioning sleep, food, allergies, what comforts your child and what frightens them. It is also where you should ask for the list of clothing and equipment, which the kindergarten is meant to give you.
The days are short at the beginning
Not just the first three. Expect a period of short days where your child is picked up early, and where each new thing — meals, naps, going outside — comes gradually. How long that period lasts depends on the child, and it is fine for it to take time.
Always say when you are leaving
Slipping out while your child is playing feels kinder in the moment and makes it worse next time: the child learns you can vanish without warning. Say goodbye, say you'll be back, and go. The short cry at the door is easier than a week with a child who doesn't dare let you out of sight.
Bring something familiar
A dummy, a comfort cloth or a soft toy. Oslo mentions it themselves, and it is not a detail: something from home is what your child can hold on to when you aren't there.
Visit before you start
Dropping by with your child before the first day makes the room familiar before everything else arrives. It costs one afternoon, and it is the cheapest settling-in there is.
What to plan for
Set aside more than three days if you can. Many find week two heavier than week one, because that is when it dawns on the child that this is a permanent arrangement and not a visit. If you can manage short days for two weeks, that is worth more than three full days followed by a full week. And expect illness: starting kindergarten usually means a run of infections, and they often arrive just as the settling-in period ends.
Starting soon? Two other guides belong with this one: what your child needs in clothing and equipment, and when a sick child can come back — the latter becomes relevant faster than you'd think.
Sources
Checked against the City of Oslo on 12 August 2026. Kindergartens organise settling-in differently, so yours may do it another way.